Networking activities are often cast aside until you actually need to start networking and by then the discomfort in reaching out to people has grown into a necessity rather than a desire of “wanting to stay in contact.”
The pressure to network can feel awkward and unnatural especially when you are thinking about quitting networking altogether because of some negative experiences. If you are about to throw in the towel with networking consider taking a few days to regroup your thoughts and exchange places with the people you are seeking.
It’s super easy to become over-sensitive when contacting people and the slightest brush off can feel as though no one wants to help, that you must be doing something wrong. While there could be some plausible reasons why your contacts aren’t helpful, they may have nothing to do with you personally.
Believe it or not some people don’t know what to say to someone who is job searching and instead of picking up the phone to offer help, they simply opt out for being embarrassed in having nothing to offer such as a job lead. While that’s not a good excuse, it happens — people can become insensitive to those in need.
There are those who resort to keeping score thinking their generosity in helping you will never be returned, so why bother to help. When you are gainfully employed, it can be easy to feel as though you will never need help, however it’s important to mention you are more than willing to help them in the future, offering upfront to exchange favors can be reassuring if they ever need support.
Another reason is that your contacts may simply be burnt out in providing information to others and can feel as though they are being taken for granted. Asking for 30 minutes of someone’s time who is busy can add up especially when you are receiving information from a friend of a friend.
Networking contacts can feel “used” and their beliefs are further confirmed by ungrateful job seekers who in the past received help left without taking the time to follow up letting the contact know the results.
“Take me off the list” is a common response from job candidates attending networking groups who attend only to receive rather than give. Networking is a life- long activity based on exchanging information and when job candidates have a one- sided view of attending job support groups it tends to wear down the goodness of others who appreciate the process.
There are numerous ways to improve your results with networking and one of them is to develop an attitude of giving. Start viewing every contact you make as a person who might need your help, be open in listening for ways you can offer help.
Another way to keep track of your persistence with contacts, being overly forceful sends a message that you are counting on them to do networking for you. Always keep in mind you might not be the only person trying to network with them. Ease up and consider changing your requests to a few people they may know rather than access to their entire database.
Be specific in your requests for help. Don’t ask question that are too broad such as “do you know anyone who is in the oil and gas field?” Rather focus your question on who they may know in a specific company or area of expertise within the oil and gas market.
The golden rule applies to networking, if you received assistance from someone they probably would like to know if their information was helpful to you. A simple follow up note goes a long way in establishing good rapport. Keeping your contacts informed paves the way for future interactions and when people feel appreciated they are more apt to feel their efforts were well spent with you.
What lessons have you learned from networking in reaching out to contacts for information?
