Having a friend do the talking for you might sound tempting if you are shy however it doesn’t present the impression you want to leave with an employer especially in a competitive job market. Take for example the job candidate who brought a friend to a career fair and the friend ended up answering most of the questions asked by recruiters at each booth.
Discussions were awkward. The recruiter asked the job candidate a question and the friend answered. While this may sound like an extreme way to deal with shyness, for some, taking a friend is the only way they would attend a career fair.
Shy people can have trouble building rapport. A job search is all about selling your skills, and to someone who struggles with shyness, the personalized marketing campaign can be discouraging. Having to sell their skills often prevents talented job candidates from meeting hiring decision-makers.
When the focus is on the word “selling” rather than on the positive outcome a new job brings, many people become intimidated.
“The problem I’m having is selling my skills and talking about my job search,” a job club participant recently told me. According to recent research on shyness, he is not alone.
The study found as much as 43% of the population struggles with shyness. It’s no wonder shyness appears to have increased over time as technology replaces human interactions making it easier to avoid social settings.
Unless you are in a sales position where it’s a part of your daily routine to call on people and introduce products or services, chances are that you are apprehensive with the idea of selling your background to an employer.
Here’s the good news: Being shy does not have to be a barrier if you chose to reframe the way you view shyness, particularly when you’re looking for a job and you’re forced to interacting more. Shyness can represent a very caring and sensitive nature which is often missing in today’s business market.
Instead of trying to avoid the discomfort, focus on being the person you would like others to know by taking small steps toward strengthening your communication skills.
There are a few factors to consider that will make an impact on your search.
You need to be able to describe your strengths. Selling your skills starts with identifying what you do on a daily basis that contributes to your employer’s success and makes you unique. That may sound like a simple task, but job seekers who are on the shy side are uncomfortable describing specific strengths using generalities instead. General terms, such as hardworking, dedicated and loyal do not make you memorable.
You can use your shyness as an advantage. Good listening skills are highly prized by employers, so that’s an area to highlight when describing yourself.
Build up your confidence and comfort level by talking about about your skills with someone who can give you good feedback. Practice will make you more comfortable and the feedback will help you craft strong, memorable statements.
The more you practice being social, the stronger you become in your job search. If needed take a friend along with you for support, represent yourself and do your own talking.
A final word: Pay attention to your self-talk and look at your shyness as just one part of the whole you — which is made up of many talents, skills and abilities. Being genuine is a part of the selling process.
